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| Credits: josie2shoes.com |
It was a rainy gloomy Saturday in my part of the world. Probably influenced by the weather, I was singing "morose" songs the whole day and apologizing to the rain: 'Sorry if it adds more to your tears, but these just have to be out.'
I found myself sitting down, lost in trains of thoughts (probably 10 times the length of Taft to North in my country's MRT). Reflections over weekends have become a habit. These do not necessarily make me sad. They just give me some moments of quiet --- timeless seconds where I can get sidetracked from routine and ask questions. The universe and God do not answer immediately. And I don't think I need answers yet.
Why can't everything be just perfect? Why do we have to feel pain even with precious memories? When we let go, does that mean we have to say goodbye, too?
At some points in our lives (or maybe now), we are thrown into situations wherein everything is turning out perfectly like a dream. Except for one teeny weeny complication.
Situation #1: Pass
You fell in love. With a great, good looking, artistically inclined, interesting guy. And he seems to feel the same way about you. No, not just 'seems'; he obviously likes you. And you obviously like him, too. But then, the setup does not technically look right or you are focused on a promising career path.
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| Credits: bubblews.com |
Situation #2: Sacrifice
You come home everyday to a lovingly prepared dinner. You have the most efficient team at work who adore and respect you despite the daily tough demands. You earn more than enough to pay for gas and groceries. You live in your most favorite city in the world. Everything is great. Except for the job itself.
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| Credits: asdfing.com |
Situation #3: Almost
You finally met an "almost soul mate". He is a rare combination of everything you could ask for from a lifetime companion --- God-fearing, smart, mature, self-driven and understanding. You can imagine having conversations with him until you grow old. He can even read your mind and ask you the right questions. How many men make an effort to do that? And then you find out he's married.
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| Credits: examiner.com |
Situation #4: Opportunity
You have a great job with bosses who mentor you instead of boss you around. You are given some of the best opportunities that no high-paying designation can possibly match. But you are away from your family and the things you hold dear.
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| Credits: ynaija.com |
While googling for pictures, I found this lovely quote: “A star falls from the sky and into your hands. Then it seeps through your veins and swims inside your blood and becomes every part of you. And then you have to put it back into the sky. And it's the most painful thing you'll ever have to do and that you've ever done. But what's yours is yours. Whether it’s up in the sky or here in your hands. And one day, it'll fall from the sky and hit you in the head real hard and that time, you won't have to put it back in the sky again.” ― C. JoyBell C.
On my reflection weekend, I am in this "star from the sky" mode. I ran the four situations above through my Thinking Playlist and got these songs...
For Situation #1: Pass, this song is easily top of mind.
S Club 7's 'Never Had A Dream Come True'
"Everybody's got something they had to leave behind.
One regret from yesterday that just seems to grow with time.
There's no use looking back or wondering how it could be now or might have been.
All this I know but still I can't find ways to let you go.
I never had a dream come true till the day I found you.
Even though I pretend that I moved on, you'll always be my baby.
I never found the words to say you're the one I think about each day.
And I know no matter where life takes me to. A part of me will always be with you."
One regret from yesterday that just seems to grow with time.
There's no use looking back or wondering how it could be now or might have been.
All this I know but still I can't find ways to let you go.
I never had a dream come true till the day I found you.
Even though I pretend that I moved on, you'll always be my baby.
I never found the words to say you're the one I think about each day.
And I know no matter where life takes me to. A part of me will always be with you."
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| Credits: finerminds.com |
Ouch. Love was there, and you just said "Pass".
Oh well, that happens. And he became the one that got away.
This is one person who will affect you for years, probably forever, even until you have a family of your own. The lesson will haunt you like a vivid dream. And hopefully when you recognize the same story from another person, like maybe your daughter, you will know what to say this time.
Oh well, that happens. And he became the one that got away.
This is one person who will affect you for years, probably forever, even until you have a family of your own. The lesson will haunt you like a vivid dream. And hopefully when you recognize the same story from another person, like maybe your daughter, you will know what to say this time.
For Situation #2: Sacrifice, I sing this song as my "pep talk" whenever I need a booster, and the chorus lines fit the bill...
Regine Velasquez' 'You Made Me Stronger'
"You made me stronger by breaking my heart. You ended my life and made a better one start."
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| Credits: katerawlings.com |
The cliche is true: 'What doesn't kill you can only make you stronger'. You may have the worst boss who seems to make life super-hard for you by downgrading your self esteem to the lowest imaginable level. You want to die any day and wake up anywhere but in this office. But you don't, right? You are better than this. Stronger than this. And you will not go down to THAT level.
For Situation #3: Almost, the song that played out from my Thinking Playlist was...
Side A's 'Set You Free'
"There were many times when we shared precious moments.
But later realized they were only stolen moments. So how are we to know that it just wasn't so.
That we just had to let each other go.
If loving you is all that means to me. When being happy is all I hoped you'd be.
Then loving you must mean I really have to set you free."
But later realized they were only stolen moments. So how are we to know that it just wasn't so.
That we just had to let each other go.
If loving you is all that means to me. When being happy is all I hoped you'd be.
Then loving you must mean I really have to set you free."
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| Credits: melpress.blogspot.com |
Love is not selfish. It finds joy in "being" and not in "having". I'm not sure if there is a previous life or another life after this, and if that would explain some of the lessons from letting go and setting free that we are taught in the most unexpected times. In this life, we sometimes meet the right people at the wrong time and we wonder if we were just late or Destiny overslept and failed at some point. When we ask God "Why?", "Why him?" or "Why now?", the Almighty keeps quiet as if to tell us to completely trust His wisdom. I remember this from the movie, A Walk to Remember: “I dont think that we're meant to understand it all the time. I think that sometimes we just have to have faith.”
For Situation #4: Opportunity, my thinking song was...
Kelly Clarkson's 'Break Away'
Kelly Clarkson's 'Break Away'
"I'll spread my wings and learn how to fly. I'll do what it takes till I touch the sky.
And I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change and breakaway.
Out of the darkness and into the sun. But I won't forget the ones that I love.
I'll take a risk, take a chance, make a change and breakaway."
And I'll make a wish, take a chance, make a change and breakaway.
Out of the darkness and into the sun. But I won't forget the ones that I love.
I'll take a risk, take a chance, make a change and breakaway."
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| Credits: netcito.squarespace.com |
Life does not happen when we play it safe. Enough said.
Have I ever been in any of these situations?
Yes. All of them.
Yes. All of them.
These are not easy situations to be in. Some give you options but there are some that you cannot change. Everything can indeed be perfect except for THIS ONE THING. I think that learning to accept the things that are beyond our control can make us better creations. It's when we recognize that someone Greater than us have placed those pieces there --- things that we cannot move and should not attempt to move lest we risk destroying our very element --- our faith in Him.
It's the strong force that keeps us going everyday even if we have a million questions that remain unanswered. Everything may be perfect but this one thing. But He has His perfect time and His perfect reason. And all we need is this almost negligible nut or bolt, the size of a little mustard seed, that will tie in everything.
If ever I run into any similar situation again, I pray that I will hold on to this.
It's the strong force that keeps us going everyday even if we have a million questions that remain unanswered. Everything may be perfect but this one thing. But He has His perfect time and His perfect reason. And all we need is this almost negligible nut or bolt, the size of a little mustard seed, that will tie in everything.
If ever I run into any similar situation again, I pray that I will hold on to this.
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| Credits: minuetoflife.com |
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